Don’t Cheat Yourself

TRX is my new challenge this session (aside from conquering that damn rollover). It’s hard for me. So freaking hard. I am so uncomfortable the entire class, it is ridiculous. My body is screaming at me the entire time to just do what I have to do to get through it. My coordination is weak. Some of the poses appear impossible (even though I can look around the room and see everyone else accomplishing it). My mind thrusts me back to a time where I thought treading water in swimming lessons was equivalent to trying not to drown. I consider the possibility of passing out and wondering how I would be able to continue as the Lead Blogger if this happened. Then I remember the possibility that in my quest to “survive,” I may have stopped breathing.

Half way through the class, I start to ask myself the inevitable question: WHY AM I HERE?!!!

Then the answer hits me with serene clarity: To challenge yourself.

I love mat and there is no denying the long list of reasons why. There will never be a day where it stops teaching me something new about my body and for that, mat and I will always stay connected.

BUT I’m not afraid of it anymore. I am comfortable in mat. I know what to expect. Even on the days it is really hard, my body fully understands what is expected of it.

But TRX is new. And my body doesn’t love it. In fact it has quite the opposite reaction it does to mat.

So why do I do it?

Because not doing it would cheat me out of something I very clearly need.

The first time I took a class with Jenn (Restore & Rejuvinate…god love it), she shared some advice, “Don’t cheat yourself.”

Those words stuck and I often play them over and over again in my mind when in a situation where cheating feels essential to survival (Ah-hem: TRX).

TRX is challenging. There is no question. I can hardly get through the modified versions of the exercises. I could hardly walk for four days after the last class I took. I considered over and over again last month that maybe it wasn’t for me and maybe, just maybe, I should stick to what I know.

But in the end, I decided that I want this. I want to attend this class until I am strong enough to get through it without considering passing out. I want to do the full exercises without modifying them. I want to get to a day where I am comfortable in TRX, the way I am comfortable in mat. I want my body to understand, without reservation, that it can handle this class.

We’re all so lucky to have such hard working and knowledgeable instructors at our disposal. And they teach us these principles that not only aid in building our individual practices, they follow us into our lives. For me, “Don’t cheat yourself” has become a measure of how hard I can push myself. Slowing down, feeling my way through and eventually conquering what I wanted to achieve.

And conquering something new while pushing the boundaries of physical comfort are what we’re all going to Lead for.